Here’s something I’m embarrassed to admit: Over the past three years, I’ve gained 40 pounds.
My wife says you can’t really tell and that I carry the weight well, but I’m not so sure. I’m the one who can feel my jeans pressing tighter at the seams, feel the boundaries of my body expanding farther away from my skeleton.
And honestly, it causes me a lot of shame. I’m embarrassed of the lack of self-control and wisdom and proper self-care habits underlying the weight gain.
But Kalyn most likely is right. I probably do hide the weight well, because I’ve had a lot of practice carrying extra weight and burdens and shame without people noticing. I carry anxiety well, and you can barely notice my depression, and you’d never know there were ghosts that won’t leave my mind alone unless I told you. Is physical weight really all that different than emotional weight? [Read more…]